Sin
by CeruleanWingedAngel
Summary: Summary:Why does this feeling that feels so right be so wrong? Why does it have to be her of all people? We could never be accepted by society. As long as I am with her my desire would only grow even further. I could never taint her soul. SxS AU Please Rn


Disclaimer: I do not own Card Captor Sakura.

On with the story!!

The silence deafening, the darkness blinding, the trance broken by the sudden ringing of a phone. A lone figure revealed by the sacred item that broke the heavy atmosphere. It stared lazily at the lifeless but noisy thing. Making no movement or whatsoever to pick up and relieve the noise cost by it. A familiar number revealed on the caller ID, Someone who he was trying to avoid more then anyone else. The more he was with her, he knew how the desire inside him would grow even further. He was already selfish enough as it is, though he knew it was anything but right. How could the feeling that felt so right be so wrong?

Of all people why it had to be her, why was everything so unfair? The only person he wanted was the only person he could never have. The feelings that he had, he could no longer remember when it started. Well aware that it could never be erase and stopped, he had decided to move away from her.

He knew that doing so would hurt her, he knew she was furious as ever, she however doesn't know that leaving her behind would hurt him more then it would hurt her. No longer could he stand to be by her side, seeing those men's lustful gaze aimed towards her, as she smiled at them as they approached her. He had reached his limits as he watched her date other men, he had no right to felt jealous, he was only her brother and nothing more. They were siblings, the harsh reality of it stabs his soul continuously.

If he stayed, he knew he would only taint her pure soul with his dirty one. It was not normal to fall for your sister is it? Society would never accept them, even their parents would not, he doubts it. And if there would be a relationship form between them more then what it should be, it would surely bring shame to their name.

It had been a week since he last seen her. It was the day of his departure. He was granted permission by his father to study abroad, in a boarding school. He could still remember the shock in her face as he told her the very same day of his departure that he would be studying abroad from then on. The pain on her emerald eyes threw daggers in his heart. Yet he had managed to keep a straight face. She begged him not to leave her, she didn't her dearest brother to be away from her, she wanted him to be by her.

His decision was almost swayed by her begging and tears, but he stood his ground. It would be best for both of them if he leaves. She still doesn't know the true reason behind his decision to leave his family behind and fly to another country. She was not aware of the sinful secret her brother holds.

She would certainly hate him if she knew the truth and he could never bare that. Specially when she would no longer be able to look at him in the eyes or smile at him. Her smiles brought light to his darken world.

For other people, they would think and believe that he had the perfect life he's very fortunate and lucky. He had the looks, the brains, the money, and the power. He had it all. Despite that why can't he have the only thing he desired. Can they really call him lucky? He had no use for any of those he only needed her and her alone.

The phone rang endlessly, his stubbornness to not answer was equal to the person who was calling. A defeated sigh had escaped his lips, he could never win against her. "Sakura." Her name escaped his lips as he answered the phone, silence reined between them. He could hear the sniffing on the other line. She was crying, as his gaze fell to the floor.

"Syaoran..." There was another pause. "I think... I dialed the wrong number... I thought it was Touya's." The lie was evident on her voice, he always knew when she lied, she was bad at it. Or maybe he just knew her too well.

Another sigh escaped his lips, he could picture her know biting her lower lips as she wonders if he bought her lie. "I see..." He replied, deciding to let her lie slide, he knew better. "Aren't you suppose to be in school at this time, Sakura?"

"..." The girl had chosen not to reply what so ever. A chuckle escaped his lips. She would never change. Once again he was sure that she had faked to be sick to escape school that day.

"What are you laughing at."

"Nothing.." Another chuckle escaped his lips. "Luckily father or mother hasn't caught your little act yet." He said rather teasingly to ease the mood.

"I am sick!" She exclaimed he could picture her lips in a pout. He heard a fake cough from the other side of the phone.

"You can't fool me.." A small smirk had formed on his lips.

"Syaoran! We haven't talked for a week and this is how you treat me, that's so mean.." The girl whined childishly making Syaoran's grin grow wider.

"Don't tell me you missed me that much already, it hasn't even a month yet." He teased once again.

"In your dreams, Syaoran!"

"Right.." He replied sarcastically. "Is that why I have tons of e-mail in my mail box?"

He could picture her redden from embarrassment at the moment and he shook his head. The question he knew she wanted to ask never came as their conversation continued it remained light and shallow, the dared not talk about deeper stuff. Afraid to ruin the atmosphere between them.

He always teases her and she always ended up losing against him. It would seem that when ever they are together they would always end up in an argument. But at times you would see them together just cuddling up like 'siblings'. That's what's really painful knowing that everything between them was because only they were siblings and nothing more.

They could never be joint in a matrimony, he wasn't even sure if she felt the same way as he did. Though he was certain that she would never feel that way about him in a lifetime. Maybe perhaps the next. It would be easier and perhaps she would even fall inlove with him. Life was never fair and never will be. He could only wish and hope that on his next life they could be born friends or even strangers. By then maybe- no surely they would be together he was gonna make sure of that.

As the two hanged up, the silence filled the room once again. A grim smile had formed in his lips. She was a dream that he could never reach, a wall that he could never climb. Elbows on the table, face buried on his palms. He glared at the table, furious at himself and at the world. And the being they called God. He had done nothing wrong to deserve this, the only sin he had committed was to love his sister. But could you blame him? You cannot chose the person you love. And this being people call their creator and their god had made him sibling, with the person he desired the most. It was all the mighty beings fault. He could not put a blame to anyone else. It was his fault for creating them siblings in the first place and making him fall inlove. He had not only hurt her because of this cursed feelings but he had also hurt her, Sakura.

Unknown to him at the very moment the girl that has been haunting his mind was on the end of her room. Her face tear stained, her eyes full of pain and sorrow. In her arms she held a bear giving by her brother, Syaoran. She has always treasured the bear it was special among her other stuff toy cause it was given by him. That bear had receive special treatment from her. Her gaze went to a picture that was taken not long ago. It was her and Syaoran, smiling very happily. She did not think that he was thinking of leaving her behind like this at that time. He dared not to show of any signs that he would leave her.

Only to her great surprise that he would be departing that very day that he had informed her. She thought long and hard if she had done anything to anger him. To cause him to leave her like this. To leave her on her own, she had not pictured a world without him. She had always thought that he would always be there for her, she realized how selfish she had been. How dependant she was with her brother. How his absence would shatter her just like that. She had begged and pleaded him to stay, yet he was not swayed. That was the only time he had denied her of what she had wanted and it hurt deeply. It was the only time he had said no to her.

Never has she realized how important her brother was. How his impact was so much. Her heart was so much in pain, it was like someone was squeezing it tightly. It was hard to breath, her gaze glassy. She had barley eaten the past week she had no appetite. She missed his goodnight kisses, how he tucked her in, his tasty cooking, his smiles and laughter and even their sibling fights. How she missed all of those and he was right. It wasn't even a month yet and she was already so broken.

Her hand rested on her chest as she thought about what she had realized just two days ago. She loved her brother dearly but not as a brother anymore but even more. She had fallen for her brother and she loved him as a man not as a family. Aware that it was a sin, what would he think about her when he finds out about her feelings? Would he looked at her weirdly? Would he shoo her away? It would break her of even one of those things was his reaction.

Determination appeared in her eyes. She doubt that he would react any of those ways. Perhaps maybe he would be uncomfortable at first but eventually their relationship would surely be what it was before. She would tell him that she was inlove with him no matter what. She had to tell him or else her feelings would never be at peace. She had to confess, she will tell him what she feels, she will follow him whether he approves of it or not. There's nothing he can do about it.

Authors Note: How did you guys like it? Was it bad? Was it good? Tell me!!! RnR please and thank you. Flames accepted as long as it's reasonable.


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